Traits to look for in a life long friend

Many people have friends. Few have real friendship. This is something I’ve come to realise about myself and people in general. Social media platforms such as Facebook and Instagram especially give the impression that a person has many friends. But they don’t. Nobody has 700 friends in real life. At least not ones they regard meaningfully.

On that note, I’ve never really had many friends. Friends in school, sure. But the ones I actually want to call, text or keep in touch with, very few.

Interestingly, I used to want many friends. In high school I wanted to be a social butterfly who would be friends with everybody. I tried and it backfired when I found out that not everyone had the same intentions. It was a good reality check.

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My mother, a life long learner

The Messenger of God ﷺ said, “The best charity a Muslim practices is acquiring some knowledge and teaching it to his brother”

I was a pretty inquisitive child growing up. I used to ask a lot of “Why?” and it seemed like I would ask that for everything that was being said to me. I think it annoyed my mother sometimes.

I was genuinely curious though. For me, understanding was correlated to reasoning so I was always trying to make sense of things and not just take things at face value.

Since we take our traits from our parents, I was quite sure I took this curiosity trait from my mother.

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What I learned when my parents didn’t let me have my way

This is intended to be a light hearted post, but one which you may or may not be able to relate to if you have strict parents. My traditional parents are very strict (my Dad for the most part). Growing up, I struggled to understand their parenting styles. It frustrated me a lot. Maybe it’s their individual personalities. Maybe they’re just paranoid about my safety.

As I get older however, I am beginning to see some wisdom in their past choices. I don’t know if I’d go so far to say that I’d be the same when I become a parent. Though there is much to understand why they didn’t let me have my way for certain areas of my life.

Caveat: I had a great upbringing. It was very colourful, albeit some what controlled. I have concluded that they obviously knew more than me at the time and saw what I couldn’t comprehend till today. Even though many of the times I didn’t get my way I would throw a fit, I ended up feeling very grounded. The wisdom of parents can only be learnt when your child hood is over.

That said, they are a lot more relaxed today. Thank God, because I’m an adult ok!

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