What’s your owner’s manual?

Relationship expert Tracy McMillan has spoken about the need to know your partner’s “owners manual” in order to have a happy relationship. It’s a great term that can be used for anyone in your life you care about and want to have a good relationship with.

What exactly is an owner’s manual?

Just like the definition, it’s an instruction manual or a user guide, a how-to-use reference for whatever product you’ve purchased or have.

But how exactly do you apply that term to relationships with people?

McMillan says it essentially works the same. Just like how the instruction manual may suggest you to add water to your car radiator once a week, relationships require a similar kind of TLC too.

Additionally, a user guide may also list things you should not do to a product to prevent danger or damage, the same kind of caution can be applied on a person.

There are so many examples to illustrate how an owner’s manual can be applied in relationships.

For example, if you know that your partner’s idea of bonding is a shared activity, you can agree to a shared activity once in a while e.g watching a movie or doing sports together, because you know it would make them happy.

For example, if you know your mother prefers to sleep early at night because she wakes up early in the morning, you know that you should not ask her for favours late into the night or disturb her for any reason.

For example, if you know that your father does not like to discuss certain things at the dinner table, you try to avoid that and find a better time or place to discuss those issues.

I kind of subconsciously have my own owner’s manual for the people in my life, and I realised that it’s important to stick to the guide because that’s what makes the person tick, and what keeps the relationship in harmony.

Because if you take care of things, they last, including relationships.


  1. What’s in my owner’s manual?

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