I like reading articles or watching vlogs/videos about friendship. It kinda gives you this cutesy vibe and for me, it reminds me of my own few tight knit friendships.
I used to think friends were just people who would always be there. I knew I really wanted to have friends, and I do make a lot of effort to keep them, but I hardly pondered what I would do if our friendship ended or faded away.
Perhaps it’s the same as romantic relationships, where we don’t necessarily think about what would happen if our lover left us. Ditched us. Decided the relationship no longer was for them. Or even if we were the one who felt that way. We tend to think about it when it happens.
I watched this video on friendship breakups and it made me think about that aspect of the friendship. Why do they happen and how do we move on?
The sad truth of life is that many things end. Relationships, friendships, connections, associations. Many end, some of which we don’t even realise has happened, but they do.
People constantly outgrow each other, outgrow experiences and feelings for various phases of their life. But nothing quite hurts as much when you feel outgrown from a person you care about.
Friends lose feelings for each other too, it’s quite normal, but it’s part of growing up.
Like relationships, people will move on and people will meet other people. It’s just the science of life. That’s why they say life goes on, because it does. And when it does, it takes you to new and different places.
And when you reach those places you will find yourself a different person too. But only if you’ve reflected.
Friendships ending and friends losing feelings for one another cannot be prevented. It happens when at minimum, one person feels they no longer feel on the same page anymore. Maybe they noticed a change in your behaviour, maybe they themself are going through something. Maybe they heard things about you that may not be true but conflicted their emotions and as a human, it’s a complex situation that they’d rather not be in. People are complicated, to put simply.
Sometimes you meet someone, but they’re not meant to stay in your life forever. That’s very true for relationships, and just as true in friendships.
The best thing one can do for themself really, is to know as a friend, you’ve tried your best. That you made an effort to make things work, to be as compatible as possible, but know that you should never force compatibility. Just like you can’t force someone to love you.
There will be other friends who come, what’s important is how you will grow and be a better friend in the next friendship.